How do I make a baby?

With my husband in the military, I'm staunchly opposed to government health care based on the level of service and care I receive from my doctors on base. Here a funny but true story.

My husband and I are planning to start a family and my OBGYN suggested I have several tests done before we even attempt to conceive. Because I needed my insurance to pay for the tests, I had to get my primary care physician on base to order the tests. I tried to be hopeful, but thoughts of "here we go again" kept rolling through my head. At least this time I knew what I needed and hoped I could bully the doctor into the tests if he was not so inclined.

I made the appointment and once in the office and explained the reason for my visit.... that my OBGYN wanted some tests done and I wanted them done for free on base. The doctor (a different one) was a young guy, probably late 20's early 30's with no wedding ring. To my delight he agreed to order the tests for me. I was having such good luck I decided to press it a little bit. Because I've never had a child before I didn't know if I had to use base doctors or if I could get referred to use my private OBGYN (which I really want to do). So I asked the doctor... "If all the tests come back great, what do I do from here. Which office on base do I contact?"
He responded with a sheepish grin and a slight blush, "well, there are all kinds of websites and information on line on how to best conceive a child." Wow.... I quickly interrupted him, "I'm quite clear on "how" to conceive a child. Let me rephrase my question. Once I am pregnant which office on base to I contact next? I realize that you don't do pregnancy care here do you?"
He cleared his throat and turned a deeper red, "No we don't do that here. I don't know what office you would contact after you are pregnant. I'll get one of the nurses to help you."

Crazy! I sincerely hope that once I am pregnant I am able to get referred off-base.. the prospect of having a baby in the hands of these government doctors is scary. Wish me luck!

Batman Relocated

Around 8:00 last night Jonathan and I were playing X-Box when Daisy starting acting like my workout mat had grown wings. My workout mat stays wedged between the wall and the TV so even though we were thoroughly engrossed in the video game we couldn't help but notice. She was smelling quickly then jumping away only creep closer and hesitantly sniff again. This process repeated about two times when I sang out, "Daisy found the bat!!!"

And while the excitement was kept to a minimum our gallant Daisy found our Bat. It was snuggled neatly in the mesh pocket, which made carrying the whole ensemble outside quite easy. Once outside I ran in to get my camera while Jonathan held the dog close enough to let her get a good smell of the tiny thing. There is a picture on the left.... kind of cute and furry.... outside.

Funny how little mammals can almost always appear cute in the right circumstances. The whole ordeal has prompted me to consider getting a bat box for our back yard. After all they can eat up to 10,000 misquotes in a single night... who wouldn't want that! The bat box might also be more appealing than attempting to live in our house.

Click the word "Bat" next to Labels to read original post.

Men in Uniform

I met Jonathan for lunch at a cute and very good French restaurant today. We decided to have lunch because, like everyone else we are watching what we spend and since this is a pricey place we opted for the cheaper lunch menu.

The moment we walked in several ladies in their late 50s were eyeing me. I'm not so gorgeous or so ugly that people stare so I was a little uncomfortable under their gaze. There looks were just looks, no condemnation - no praise. What could they be thinking? Not that I really mind or care... just curious.

Then the host offered us a table right by the door. If you've been out with Jonathan and I a few times you'll realize we've no problem refusing a table in a "high traffic" area. We feel if we're going to spend our money we're not going to enjoy it in peace. Not surprisingly when the host offered another table in a more secluded spot we said we'd wait while he cleaned, cleared and set the table. Waiting... I tried to stand up straight, smile at Jonathan... so handsome with his fresh haircut and in uniform. They were still watching just not as openly now.

Finally I was in the safety of my seat and could devote my attention away from the two women. Food... ahh how we love good food. Jonathan had some wonderful-smelling lamb on faccaccia bread and I had my dinner out usual - mixed greens salad with steak and goat cheese. The lunch began uneventful in that we talked about what we always do... the house and it's state of disrepair.

The owner of the restaurant (also our host that cleaned and set our table) was having a gathering in the restaurant at the same time and our server informed us that the owner's mother was the chef of the day for the little party. We watched curiously as the appetizers came out and that curiosity got the best of us. We asked our server what was on the appetizer plate; she didn't know. A few minutes later she returned with a small appetizer plate for us and said, "There were extras in the kitchen; not everyone showed up so you are welcome to have this." She didn't offer an explination of what it was but it was obvious close up that there were two muscles, some pate and another baked unidentifiable treat. Have I mentioned that we love excellent food.... we would eat ourselves to death if the prospect wasn't so unattractive.

To end the meal we shared a little cup of chocolate moose. Our server cleared away the empty cup; my eyes watching its voyage away from the table (ahh I love food!) The server returned promptly and told us that someone had taken care of our check and wished to remain anonymous. As she was speaking I was immediately looking for some joke or sarcasm or something to indicate that I had not heard her correctly. Still shaking visions of chocolate moose from my mind, dumbly I said, "So we can just leave?" She smiled and nodded then left.

Jonathan and I looked at each other not knowing what to think. I was still attempting to work out the puzzle and he finally spoke, "I guess I should leave a tip." To which I quickly answered, "Absolutely." We left the tip and started toward the door. I was still waiting for someone or something to jump out and embarrass us. As we closed the door behind us Jonathan put his blue uniform hat on and it dawned on me that someone had bought our lunch as a show of support for the military and his service! Jonathan was speechless and then giddy. His faith in mankind renewed after so many years with so little show of support.

Was it the owner? Was it the ladies who may have been looking at Jonathan standing right behind me? Will it be me or you next time? Only God knows. I pray that God will bless the giver and continue to humble our hearts.

So thank you with all my heart to all of you out there who are brave enough to put your money where your heart is!

Bats and Vampires in the Night

It just so happens I was up late reading the latest teenie bopper vampire novel and eventually attempted to sleep, my head whirling with questions about the stupid heroine and vampire hero. All the while my faithful yellow lab and husband lay snoring through all the excitement in my head. Finally blessed with sleep and sweet dreams of immortality and running without growing tired (yeah... if you ever pounded away on a treadmill you understand.) The happy sound of my lab running playfully around the bedroom woke me from my dreams. My husband snored on as I strained to listen in the darkness; Daisy was chasing something......

Then I heard a faint whoosh whoosh of wings and felt something plop softly on my down comforter. Not moving I said nervously to my husband, "There is something in here." He woke up at once, listening to the dog prance happily around the room. Before my husband could reply I felt his question and responded, "It's an animal." Then I kicked the comforter right as my husband clicked on the light to reveal a large black object soring effortlessly around the room. Jonathan was standing beside the bed as I pulled the blankets up to my chin. "Its a bat!" he finally breathed as we both watched it disappear into the hallway through the open door.

Instinct took over and I went to the bedroom door and closed it. This seemed a logical way to have uninterrupted planning time for how to combat this new foe. My husband viewed it as peace and quite and climbed back into bed, turning off the light. Even my excitable Daisy laid back down and went to sleep. Deciding I did not want or know how to fight the terrible thing alone so I climbed back into bed and attempted to go back to sleep.

I think it goes without saying that I didn't sleep AT ALL. This terrible, perhaps rabies ridden rat with wings was now soaring around my house. I tried to calm myself with stupid thoughts that made the bat out to be smarter that it is... "maybe it will get back outside on its own." The night continued on and my bladder began to grow heavy with the morning ritual calling but I didn't want to leave our bat-free sanctuary until the first rays of dawn came through the window (because they are afraid of the light right?) When dawn saved me, I crept carefully into the hall and made my way to the bathroom. No sign of the bat anywhere. At first I was relieved, then I started wondering where it went. While getting ready for work Jonathan remarked, "Maybe it was a mistake to not get it outside last night. No telling where it is now." I sighed; I'll have bat and vampire nightmares now I'm sure.

It is now 10:00 am and I still have no idea where the bat is.... maybe in one of the many open holes in our house. (Our house is being remodeled and there are lots of holes in dry wall for light fixtures, vents and the like.)

I'll let you know if we ever find it.